{"id":1019,"date":"2019-05-02T08:01:17","date_gmt":"2019-05-01T20:01:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/?p=1019"},"modified":"2021-06-23T16:58:28","modified_gmt":"2021-06-23T04:58:28","slug":"robot-on-the-loose","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/?p=1019","title":{"rendered":"Robot on the loose!!"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" src=\"http:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/robot.gif\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-1021\" width=\"518\" height=\"379\"\/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Arggghhhhh!!!!!!<br>Processing through another massive trigger attack<br>Trying to describe what happens within <br>to explain the outward displays of apparent irrational behaviours<br><br>Well they seem to be irrational<br>to those who are not living in my skin<br><br>But in my head Robot is blindly circling amok yelling <br>&#8216;danger! danger! danger! danger!<br>do not compute!&#8217;<br><br>distressing my brain even more<br>exposing every nerve ending<br>until they are bleeding raw pain<br><br>Every part my body is fraught <br>on edge<br>skrieking at the slightest infraction<br>Fear rises to the surface<br><br>I&#8217;m frightened<br>of everything I perceive as threatening<br>anything that might possibly compromise my safety<br>of loss<br>of death<br>just. plain. scared.<br><br>I cry<br>all the time<br>tears flow too damn freely<br>uncontrollable <br>I hate myself<br>for being like this<br><br>Processing deeply<br>trying to understand myself<br>Trying to understand myself so others might try to understand me<br><br>How can they<br>when I struggle to understand myself<br><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Arggghhhhh!!!!!!Processing through another massive trigger attackTrying to describe what happens within to explain the outward displays of apparent irrational behaviours Well they seem to be irrationalto those who are not living in my skin But in my head Robot is blindly circling amok yelling &#8216;danger! danger! danger! danger!do not compute!&#8217; distressing my brain even moreexposing &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/?p=1019\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Robot on the loose!!&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[19,69,47,67,49,48,68,70,1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1019"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1023,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1019\/revisions\/1023"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1019"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1019"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1019"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}