The hardest thing to talk about it with your family and friends is the the topic that most people like to laugh and joke about.
\nSex.
\nI miss making love.
\nBut it isn\u2019t cool to think your parents have sex.<\/p>\n
It is not even thinkable that they may even enjoy sex.
\nSo when your heart dies and you are left alone, how do you explain what you are missing when you are not supposed to talk about it.
\nI miss my heart so much.
\nThe loneliness of not touching.
\nThe not being held in that intimate way that only he could.
\nThe loneliness of our marriage bed.
\nIt\u2019s emptiness.
\nIt\u2019s coldness, despite the electric blanket and new warm down duvets.
\nThe absence of intimacy
\nHands exploring places that only he was allowed.
\nThe arousal and pleasure in the midnight hours.
\nThe comfort given in the early mornings.
\nThe kisses and hugs throughout the day.
\nHe loved to \u2018shock\u2018 the kids by showing them how much he loved me with kisses in the kitchen,
\nWe would snuggle in the chair in the study whilst discussing business.
\nEven the wee pleasures of cutting his hair.
\nHe loved for me to do that because we could enjoy special private moments under the guise of practicalities.
\nSex isn\u2019t just the act itself.
\nIt is a 24 hour thing.
\nThe recognition of a love throughout the day.
\nMy heart broke that day and no amount of ducktape will ever put it together again.<\/p>\n
The absence of intimacy with him is what breaks my heart more and more each day.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The hardest thing to talk about it with your family and friends is the the topic that most people like to laugh and joke about. Sex. I miss making love. But it isn\u2019t cool to think your parents have sex. It is not even thinkable that they may even enjoy sex. So when your heart … Continue reading “The Absence of Intimacy Sept 2013”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/614"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=614"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/614\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":615,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/614\/revisions\/615"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=614"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=614"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mybigballofstring.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=614"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}