My Body Image Peregrination

My life journey is a constant thread on here.
Mainly because this is my blog and I know me better than anyone else so I talk about me.
But only so I can share, to empathise, encourage and empower.
As most of you know I love words and the word journey is getting a bit stale to me so today I am going to talk about my peregrination, as it has been rather a long meander getting to where I am now.
This rumination today is about body image.

From my observations most women – and maybe men, but I’m not qualified to talk for the opposing sex – have body issues.
I have certainly not been exempt.
I had a fairly tidy figure when I got married at 21 – 173cm tall and weighed in at 66kg.
But from young I had issues with certain parts of my anatomy which looking back seem really stupid now, but……
….sadly I was not alone.
The abuse and headfucking I went through in my childhood certainly didn’t help matters and unfortunately I know I am definitely not alone in that area.
These occurrences alter our appreciation of self immeasurably.

My weight and shape has changed dramatically throughout my life.
You cannot go through 11 pregnancies & births, breast feed 10 babies and suffer multiple accidents to many parts of the anatomy over the years  without some significant body carnage.

Living on 60’ slopes for 36 years was a reason (I know, not a good reason, but a reason nonetheless!)  for me to not go walking much due to damaged knees.
I tried in latter times by purchasing a tredmill.
It got used and I did try all sorts of other means/diets etc to try & keep in shape but it was a very ebb & flow thing depending on my moods and events of the times.

Anyway, fast forward to 2013.
That fateful month of February when my life was traumatically turned upside down & inside out.
My reaction was to retreat to my bed, eat comfort foods and watch brainless movies for months.
Assuaging grief in the most consoling way I could.
And that was okay for then.
From there was the period of running away with my two babes.
Tramping boots were bought and some moderate walks undertaken during our travels.
Then two years ago we moved to the city.
The moving process once again added more damage to my back, hips & shoulders so ongoing physio was required.

But I was making baby steps.
We bought bikes.
I biked for several months until we got the puppy.
Then I began walking him around the streets.
It was really enjoyable to wander the river and explore the city.
Slowly I was increasing my exercise time.
Unfortunately a couple more severe accidents slowed me down with injuries and long term recovery periods.
At the same time I was also dealing with some very hard stuff.
My ptsd levels were often going through the roof.
My headspace wasn’t wonderful.
In fact early-mid 2016 was probably the darkest, heaviest space I had been in since Tim died.
I received test results from the Dr saying I was pre diabetic.
They wanted me to join in with Green Prescription and go to aquafit classes and discussion groups to help me loose weight etc.
In essence it was probably all very good and helpful BUT I was very definitely NOT in the right headspace to so anything extra so basically told them to fuck off!
Then finally after 40 months of very intense grieving, my brain finally began to clear.
Lucidity began.
I set about making some much needed rational decisions.
Once that was underway I began to want to look more aggressively at my health & wellbeing.
I took ownership and control.
I reduced my intake of sugars and carbs – I know from experience that they are the worst enemies for my body type.

I joined the gym and with encouragement from my daughter that it would take me at least 2 weeks of determination to make it a habit I stuck with it.
The trainer set me a routine which I worked hard at.
I was juggling my youngest kids needs which at the time were pretty intense, but was trying really hard to put mine up there on the top of the list too.
I roll out of bed around 6am at least 4-5 mornings a week because I know for me that if I do not get there and do my work out and pump the cardio before 7am it is just not going to happen.
And now I really, really love going.
My trainer reworks my programme every month or so too help me strengthen and tone up this battered body of mine.
I can vouch for all those proven studies that exercise produces endorphins which really do reduce stress, increase happiness & energy levels, ward off anxiety and depression, improve sleep and boosts self esteem.
But! I had to be in the right headspace to even contemplate attacking it.
If I had tried earlier I can honestly say I would’ve failed.
I had to be ready to bite the bullet with a sense of determination.

Around this time I became aware of the Isagenix products.
I had been very skeptical at first but after a while I discovered my daughter Sunniva was already using them so discussed it with her.
Her response was that she had no idea how they worked but that they did work and the she has far more energy than ever before.
So I decided to give them a go.
Not just for me but also for my 16 year old daughter who also needs a lot of energy for her rowing.
She & I took the products to a well known naturopath here and had them checked out and she said they were all good and that it was the amino acids that were doing the job.
So on that recommendation we joined up and began to use them.
I love using the products.
I tweak as I want.
I particularly love the shakes and cleanses.
I am not religious about them, I use to suit me and my lifestyle.
Since I began going to the gym and using the Isagenix the weight has been falling off me.
I honestly do not count calories or do anything that is mind controlling.

In amongst all of this there have been several interesting influences regarding the body image issues.
I came across the Australian blogger Constance Hall.
And, as have many women have, found her approach to be incredibly liberating.
She’s raw and open and honest and completely out there.
And I absolutely love that.
I was thrilled to have the opportunity to meet her when in Perth a few months ago.
Another Australian,  Taryn Brumfitt, began the Body Image Movement with her docs/movie Embrace.
This movie is absolutely brilliant and should be seen by all.
These women along with many others have been such an encouragement.

While in Perth I went shipping with my niece.
It was so much fun.
I bought myself a new swimsuit.
We walked into the shop and I announced ‘I don’t do black’.
Sam followed me in saying ‘And she don’t do Nana either!’ 🙂
But after trying almost every colourful swimsuit in the shop we then turned to the black ones.
And guess what.
They worked.
And I found this one 🙂

Then I said – ‘right, now I have that sorted. Let me see some bikinis’!!
The absolute best thing about shopping with the niece as opposed to the daughters was the encouragement 🙂
I have not worn a bikini since I was in my teens!~!
And to even consider doing so was a huge step.
But after over 5 decades of hating on my body I decided it is now time to love it instead.

Scars are the tattoos of the brave according to my son.
This body of mine has more than earned its stripes, its scars and its tattoos.
It’s bravery deserves to be honoured.
Yes, I have lost weight but that is not the issue here.
The issue is loving yourself.
Recognising that this body is not an ornament – it is a vehicle.
It has strength and purpose.
So even after Tim died when my weight skyrocketed up to 83 kgs plus it was still a purposeful vehicle.
I just didn’t appreciate its worth.
During all my child birthing years when I would moan about not fitting my clothes Tim would just tell me to go buy a bigger pair of jeans.
He saw me as the women he loved no matter my size.
He didn’t care, he loved me for who I was.
It was a tragedy that I didn’t see that.

I don’t really see a huge change but friends have been commenting.
Here are some photos taken 3 months apart.
Remember that there is no way on this planet that I would’ve posted any photos like this before!
Huge steps forward in acceptance of self 🙂

3 September = 80.4kgs

11 December = 74.4kgs

I don’t need the scales, I know by my clothes that my body is changing shape.
I have just dumped a pile of size 14 jeans etc out of my wardrobe.
Went shopping cuz they were a tad loose and came out in size 11’s.
That really blew my brain!
Then a month later I went back to buy a belt because they were loose.
But what is super cool is that it is not the weight loss that matters to me.
It is the feeling of being well, and happy and feeling my body becoming  toned and stronger.
And knowing that the physical events that I want to tackle are becoming manageable.

My therapist commented to me recently that she was glad to see I had my spark back.
I thought on that and responded that actually, I do not ever recall having ‘a spark’ like this before.
I have so much exuberant energy that I feel like the Energiser bunny on full batteries!!
Even when the batteries run down a tad I am still in a really happy place.

My body and I are finally friends who are pretty damned proud to be seen together in public 🙂
Christmas Day at Cable Bay 2016

Becoming Woman – A Wild Warrior Woman

I’ve been exploring my wild self.
Learning about me
My inner innate self
Peeling back layers of societal constraint
Pushing myself out of my comfort zone
Questioning
all my pre-learned norms

Discovering that being a wild woman has nothing to do with
doing wild things
or stomping on male egos

It is about embracing your true natural self.
For one
that may be loud and out there – whirling through life in dervish excitement
for another
that is could be silent and contemplative
and everything in between
and maybe even at the same time

It is the woman who wants to break free from all the strings society has placed on her to find herself in the heart of love and compassion

A few days ago I experienced a sudden awakening
I know what happened…
…physically
that I will never ever forget
I have learnt how it has damaged me
…emotionally
…mentally
that I am recovering and healing from

But the light went on with a suddenness that kicked me in the gut
it was like a lightening bolt hit me
I saw with incredible clarity
As a child
I was completely Mind Fucked
My God!
It wasn’t my fault.
I knew it wasn’t my fault
I know it wasn’t my fault
But
Now
I
Know
None
Of
It
Was
My
Fault!
The release of shame
and guilt
and the burden
with that understanding
has been immense

I have been entrenching myself in this song
Soaking in the words
Whirling to the music
Unfucking myself
Claiming my Warrior Woman
And allowing this brave heart of mine to shine

“Warrior” – Aurora
I fall asleep in my own tears
I cry for the the world, for everyone
And I built a boat to float in
I’m floating away

I can’t recall last time I opened my eyes to see the world as beautiful
And I built a cage to hide in
I’m hiding, I’m trying to battle the night…

Let love conquer your mind
Warrior, warrior
Just reach out for the light
Warrior, warrior
I am a-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
Warrior, warrior
I am a-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
Warrior, warrior of love…

I stand behind the wall of people and thoughts, mind controlling
And I hold a sword to guide me
I’m fighting my way…

I can’t recall last time I opened my eyes to see the world as beautiful
And I built a cage to hide in
I’m hiding, I’m trying to battle the night…

Let love conquer your mind
Warrior, warrior
Just reach out for the light
Warrior, warrior
I am a-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
Warrior, warrior
I am a-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
Warrior, warrior of love!

Underneath darkened sky
There’s a light kept alive

Let love conquer your mind
Warrior, warrior
Just reach out for the light
Warrior, warrior
I am a-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
Warrior, warrior
I am a-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah
Warrior, warrior of love…
Warrior of love!
Warrior of love!

Sparkling living

This journey of mine has taken me on many detours.
Some have been incredibly hard.
Others frustrating.
And more, emotionally disabling.
Through it all though I have found a new me.
A stronger me.
Someone I did not know existed.
Many close to me have recently commented that they are so pleased and glad to see me smiling again.
It was said that I have my spark back.
That stopped me…
To breath…
And think…
I honestly do not ever remember having a spark.
Not like this.
Never.
Maybe as a very small child I probably had that childish spark of mischief and wonderment.
Like this gorgeous poppet I captured at the beach last week.
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But that spark was cruelly extinguished at a very early age.
Yes, I was happy – to an extent.
But there was always that underlying ‘thing’
The part of my life I wasn’t able to talk about…
The secret…
The burden I carried…
that killed my spark.

I had no idea until recent years just how much those 10 years of stolen childhood had affected my entire life.
But now I am walking my healing journey
Running towards an expectancy of wonderment
Reclaiming ‘me’
I am not going to compromise myself anymore with the pain and the abuse and the heartache.
Because I Am all I have got and I Am going to live sparkling.
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Strength in the night….

This past week…
Wow!
What a week.
Trying to process it all has been huge.
The demise of the master.
Then the destruction of a masterpiece.
There were not too many Kiwis who will forget the time 00:02 and the date 14 November 2016.
The terror of being awoken by the ominous rumbling and the violent shaking and the darkness and the unknown damage being wrought around each of us.
For those of us fortunate enough to not lose power there was immediate and frantic checking in on Facebook and Geonet to see what was going on and ensuring loved ones were safe.
I was so grateful to have Eilidh here with me.
She and I kept each other company as unbelievably my children and pups slept through the whole night!
Texts, messages & phone calls flew between family and friends.
These vital connections helped maintain a certain calm amidst the chaos.

A sleepless night ahead as the aftershocks hit, the anxiety that any of these might be a bigger one.
In the few hours following we experienced 6 quakes larger than magnitude 5, and over the week since, 357 aftershocks over magnitude 4.
Reports unfolded as the morning developed.
And the reports have gotten worse with each daylight hour.
The enormity of the power released is unfathomable.
The east coast sea bed thrust up 2 metres with such force and speed that sea life had no chance to escape.
The GPS station at Cape Campbell was moved 2 meters north.
Towns completely cut off, isolated by huge landslides and destroyed roads, rail lines twisted and moved like cotton candy.
Two people died.
A miracle there were no more.
Many others injured and traumatised.

I managed about 2 hours sleep, then Mahalia unknowingly woke me at 6am cuz she knew I was planning to go to the gym.
Ah! The normality of life.
As Monday unfolded, unraveling of the disaster gave clarity to the desperation of the situation for the people on the East Coast.
Especially those in Kaikoura who were totally trapped.
Then Waiau, then we realised that pretty much most of the top of the South Island was not only isolated from the rest of the country but also from each other.
Then came the tsunami alerts.
The King Tides.
And then came the rain.
Flooding in Nelson, Wellington, more damage, more chaos.
I thought we had escaped pretty much unscathed but then the call came from down home.
Seb & Phoebe were evacuating by boat after watching a huge landslide flow down the hill surrounding the house & buildings and covering the road metres deep in wet slurry.
I was just grateful they were safe.
There have been many things to be thankful for in amongst all of this.
Thankful they had a home to come to.
Thankful for friends who provided emergency vehicles and household provisions until we can retrieve their things.
Now to add to the merry-go-round of my life I begin the EQC dance as we begin organising the clean up.

In the scale of the events, ours is but a small portion.
But in our personal lives it is rather devastating to say the least.
I have been standing so strong in the past months.
I have gained my warrior crown.
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I must admit that on this day it slipped.
But I am proud of myself, because I never let it fall to the ground.
I caught it and let it wash in the tears of the moment.
Then I set it straight and stood up and faced the moment head on.
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To sign off in true Kiwi style
Heres some humour for the occasion.
Check out this wonderful rendition by Jason Gunn.
Thanks for keeping us smiling Jason 🙂

Self care

Since I have moved to town and begun working with vulnerable & abused women I have been introduced to the notion of self care.
In our training we were taught that self care is vitally important.
After so many years of putting myself and my needs second, or third – actually probably more than 12th in line this was sort of a new concept for me.

I have spent so many years being strong, the one that everyone depends on, the one that gets things done, the busy one.
I didn’t realise until about 5.5 years ago when my brain said enough and I had a major breakdown.
I had no idea what was happening to me until a friend asked me a question.
Do you think you might be depressed?
Seriously  – me depressed!
I dont ‘do’ depressed!
I haven’t got time for that nonsense :-/
But, her question & concern stopped me in my tracks and I took the plunge and went to my Dr.
That in itself was a major exercise at the time.
Anyway, the upshot was, for the first time in my entire life I was able to tell someone about the extensive sexual and emotional abuse I endured for over 10 years of my childhood.
And from there I began my healing.
It has not been easy, it is never easy to open old and deep wounds and expose them.
In fact it is very scary.
I was, and am, a mother of many, and a wife, running businesses alongside my man.
Life was busy.
I had not realised that busyness is one of the ways that abuse victims ‘use’ to ‘forget’ what has happened to them.
Not that you ever ever forget!
Life didn’t get any easy with this disclosure, in fact it got a hell of a lot harder.
My journey of self discovery has been incredibly tumultuous.
I have discovered who my true friends are.
Part of my self preservation has been learning to close the door on those who can’t or won’t support me and to embrace those who can and do.

My therapist has been flabbergasted over the years as one historic trauma after another is disclosed as well as more stress and trauma that has occurred along the way since then.
She commented to me one day that my PTSD was incredibly complex.
I picture my traumas over the years as pieces of string, they have knotted together and through time have wound themselves into a very big ball of string.
Hence the name of this new blog 🙂
I am slowly unraveling and dealing with each piece, unknotting, unraveling,  and using them to weave a new garment.
My new garment is going to be stunningly gorgeous and of course the predominant colour will be Orange 🙂

So back to self care.
For me this has not happened overnight.
It has been quite a journey.
Slowly slowly, baby steps, three steps forward and one back, sometimes it has felt like four back!!

My self care began with mending my mind.
Learning how to process what has happened, how it has affected me and the way I deal with situations and then to relearn new ways, more healthy ways of approaching similar situations.
This takes time and I am ever so grateful to have found a therapist who has worked with me gently over the past 5 years.

Physical rest has also been important.
I have pushed myself for so long, the subconscious need to keep busy to bury everything sort of busy.
When Tim was killed my body stopped.
I was literally unable to do anything but go through the motions.
I stopped cooking, reading, listening to music, art……
I literally shut down and spent most of my time hiding in my room watching brainless movies.

Then I ran away.
I took my two youngest and we ran away.
It really wasn’t a conscious decision.
It just happened, but it was a good happening.
We spent most part of a year on the move.
We had some amazing adventures and did some much needed bonding and healing.
It was a very precious time for us all.
It resulted in us moving to town and away from my most recent pain of losing our main man.

One of the first things I did was to apply for a partially voluntary job with SASH Nelson.
It was pretty daunting applying for the first job in nearly 40 years.
But the cool thing was that I was accepted to be a part of the Crisis Response Team.
Becoming part of the team has played a huge part in my healing journey.
My team mates are the most awesome girls, they have become members of my new Village.
It was through this job that I have learnt much more about the importance of self care.
Plus I am able to help support others because I have an empathy and understanding with them.
And helping them is helping me – win win 🙂

And now to now!
Where am I at now?
Well, I am kickin’ arse.
I am so incredibly proud of myself.
I still have down days, days where the tears rule, where I hit the floor in a sobbing heap.
But those days are less frequent.
I have days where I am incredibly lonely, but I am learning to reach out.
I am in a much stronger headspace.
And being in a stronger headspace has given me the ability to focus on my physical being.
Living in the central city on the flat has allowed me to gradually build up my fitness levels.
Due to a lot of injuries both historic and recent my body has been rather battered so walking has been good therapy.
I have restored my soul by wandering around the river and roads with the puppy, discovering new places and friends.
Recently I felt in the right place & ready, so have joined up with a local gym & pool.
It is 10 years since I did any serious gym work.
I have really enjoyed going down there first thing most mornings and getting a good cardio session going.
The trainers have put together a programme for me in the weights room, and after just a month I am feeling so damn good.
I am not focusing on weight loss, just getting my body toned and functioning again.
Yesterday I was very conscious that all my jeans were getting very loose and quite baggy – not really the look I like – so I popped in to see the girls at JeansWest and they helped me find some new jeans.
Unbelievable – I have gone from size 14 down to size 11.
I haven’t been that size in about 28 years!!
This morning, I am feeling really buzzed from my Vitamin G(ym) fix this morning.
In fact I am feeling frickin’ fantastic  🙂
This self care stuff is actually pretty damn good.
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Daring greatly during difficult days

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When you think the absolute worst thing to happen to you has already happened, yet another curved ball comes from left field and totally blind sides you.

In my current emotionally exhausted melancholic state I look back over my nearly 60 years and can readily recall some of the largest curved balls that have smashed into me. In amongst them smaller balls which hit with slightly less aggressive force and their bruises are sometimes not terribly visible until a trigger prompts their memory.

These balls have battered and bruised me. Some have near killed me. But I have always picked myself up, reached down, picked up the ball and run with it. Trying to run with the weight of these balls adding up over the years have resulted in a medical diagnosis of post traumatic stress disorder.

In recent times I’ve been pitched some huge balls that have hit me fair in the gut. Smashed the wind clean out of me. Left me wondering how on earth I can carry on.

But I did, and I do. My natural instinct has been to recoil inwards, hold my pain, cradle it tight like a precious child, protecting it, kicking out at anyone who dares to come near, fighting, fighting, fighting for……. fighting for what?

Fighting to protect my vulnerability. Fighting to prevent more hurt, more pain. Because after all, if you don’t allow anyone in then you can’t get hurt again. Right?

Wrong.

Brené Brown taught me that by exposing my vulnerability I gain strength.

How?

By exposing my desperate needs, my hurts, my pain, learning to trust, I slowly rebuild my village.

When those massive curved balls smash into you they break the protective walls that surrounded you, they don’t just batter you but they send your village scattering. Leaving only one or two of your tribe behind if you’re lucky.

It is then you make your choices. Run and hide, head for the hills, curl up in a ball, stay alone, protect yourself….

or reach out, find empathy, build strength, learn to trust, abandon shame, tell your story,

It takes a while to rebuild, to create a new village, foundation bricks are tested, ones who prove to be trustworthy and strong are added to the new foundations, the ones who are not are cast aside. You tentatively reach out, test the waters, learn who to trust, each brick in place adds more strength. A new village is constructed. Your new tribe rises to surround and support you. A tribe that is prepared to cover your back, to stand alongside, to encourage, empower, support, and no matter what, love you no matter what.

A tribe you can stand sweaty, strong & bloodied in the arena with – a tribe who will dare greatly with you!

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.”

Teddy Roosevelt 1910

Shopping with Sam

Sam took me shopping today.
I found a swimwear shop I wanted to go to so off we went to find Luce Del Sol.
It is a lovely wee shop full of wonderful swimwear and a very helpful owner.
I walked in and said I don’t wear black, and Sam added that I don’t do Nana either!
So that said she found me everything that was colourful.
I spent ages trying on every swimsuit in the shop – well it felt like every one!
But nothing was really rocking my boat.
So I began looking at the black suits.
And guess what?
They looked great.
And I found the one I loved and felt so good in.
Once I had that nailed I then started trying on two pieces.
Then I found a bikini – yes a bikini!!
Haven’t worn one since I was in my teens.
Never ever thought I would or could again.
I love it 🙂

I was telling my girls recently that after watching a few TV shows like Botched and Beauty & the Beach I have finally decided that at my age and stage in life I am finally perfectly happy with my body.
I’ve had 11 pregnancies, birthed 10 babies – and none too small either!
I’ve breast fed them all – each of them for quite some time.
I don’t have any stretch marks, my boobs aren’t hitting my ankles.
The excess flab around the middle is being dealt to gradually, and I am not getting too hung up about the lack of abdominal muscle tone anymore because my babies made short work of destroying that!
So I am now going to totally get my Queen on this coming summer in my new beach attire 🙂
And maybe, just maybe, I might get a photo up sometime 😉

After the marathon we were both famished so wandered up the street and found Roots & Greens smoothie and juice bar.
Got some wonderfully energising smoothies full of beetroot and stuff to kick us into the afternoon.
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I love the quaint old buildings around Fremantle.
These ones were just across the road.
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We found another shop which had a sale on.
It was a hellishly expensive place but I fell in love with this scarf.
Dithered muchly and then decided I would really regret not getting it.
So I did and I am happy 🙂
It is very different to any other scarf I have.img_9441img_9459

Jesika met us at Sam’s and then she and I went off for a massage.
It was so good.
The guy worked wonders on my shoulders and also my calves, especially the right one which has really knotted up since my altercation with a tow bar a few months ago.
I am going to have to get some on going treatment once I return home.
Sam arrived for her massage just as we had finished.
Then it was back to Jesika & Evan’s for dinner and bed.

Meeting Constance

Saturday morning it was wet.
Perth has been experiencing the coldest winter in 20 years and it is also very wet.
So I didn’t need to pack any sunscreen!
Just the same old winter stuff I’ve been wearing for past months back home.
I went with Jesika to the Manning Farmers Market.
The rain was heavy and then it would clear, and then down she’d come again Trev!
It was a lovely market, Jesika has her favourite vege and fruit stalls so we wandered between them and the others that I was interested in.
Like food and coffee and crafts etc.
The crepe stall did really really good avocado wraps with spinach.
The coffee cart next door looked better than it tasted :-/
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On the way home I checked into Facebook, as you do.
And saw to my delight that Constance was signing her books ‘Like a Queen’ at Subiaco today!
Jesika wasn’t going to take me, no way, not ever 😉
All good – she had a party to prepare for.
So I called Sam, pretty sure she’d be keen and yes she was.
So we drove up to Subiaco and discovered Constance is a one very popular lady.
We already knew that she has a world wide following on her blog ‘Queens of Constance’ and Facebook but seeing so many local women queuing cemented that.
In fact the line of women and the occasional husband/partner & children went for miles up the stairs and though the hallways of the Subiaco Hotel.
So long in fact that we were queuing for around 2 hours!
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Was it worth the wait.
You bet it was!
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Loved this sculpture – I thought is was representing all the queens floating out of the hotel after having our books signed and our few moments with Constance.
The best thing along the way though was meeting and chatting with other women who were there from all walks, ages & stages of life.
Her blunt honest way of communicating about the reality of life in the fast lane of motherhood has broken through so many barriers because we all identify with her in some way or other.
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Afterwards we were right hungry we were, so headed home asap, stopping at a supermarket along the way to find food.